"Hold on a second, man! I haven't even unzipped my fly yet!"

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Message to the public from Starbar patrons: WE HAVE FINGERS!

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There once was a time when I had never seen this picture.

Can we go back to that time?

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It's ok, bro. I'm sure plenty of dudes have to hide their boners during Herbal Essence commercials.

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"Reserved... For whoever walks up next!"

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The phrase is "SLEEP with one eye open!"

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See? No Adam's Apple!

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"Ok, I surrender! Just cover up your man boob already!"

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Hey, Kryg, I have a new word to teach you!

CROP! But thanks, cuz this is hilarious!

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The Earthtones are so in love!

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Did Devon Sawa get a sex change?

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So did someone put a lemon in the right side of her mouth only?

Also, is he pointing at his own armpit?

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Wait.. Did you say you wanted your picture with douchebags?

Or without?

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To me, this screams "match made in heaven!"

They even blend in with their surroundings, too!

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At long last, they've made camoflage clothing for the patrons at Apt 720!

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I personally find what is going on with their arms very confusing.

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Hungry? Why wait?

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Can someone please tell me whether the girl on the left is wearing pants or not? Pretty please?

Kthanks.

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Orange girls need love, too.

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Yeah.... That's very...sexy?

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If you pull her finger, does her hair further expand?

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Ooh! I have an idea! I'll spray myself fluorescent orange and figure out a face I can make that makes me look idiotic...

then I'll make said face every time a camera is within ten yards! That should help me make more orange friends!

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Eat your heart out, so-and-so!

Actually, why don't I just eat your heart? Then I can wear your skin as a suit!....

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"I'm here because these girls are fascinating conversationalists."

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Apparently a collar-less shirt and tie is a new part of the douchiform.

Bonus accessories: Duck-face girls!

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Is being orange and radioactive a necessary part of the dress code here?

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Oops! Looks like someone forgot her dignity (Oops, I meant "pants!") at home!

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The # of times this guy's tongue is going where his pinky is tonight is....

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The number of nostrils you can see up is....

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One of my three wishes is that you never wear this again.

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People still wear Ed Hardy? Really?

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No, paparrazzi, please!

I can't get caught sandwhiched between 2 hot blonds again!

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SOOOOOOOO BIG!

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Slash, is that you?

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READER SUBMISSION

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Note from Mockwaukee - This is an awkward picture, but it was submitted without a caption. I'll let you decide what the caption should be.